Relationships - they've been around as long as we have. Given that, you'd think we figured it out by now. While having happy relationships seems easy to some people, others struggle with it for years. Below are ten secrets to happy, healthy relationships:
1. Communication
1. Communication
The number one thing in any relationship that you want to work should be communication. Way too many times people hold back their opinions and thoughts. Even though sometimes they do it out of love and because they are afraid they'll hurt those they love, it's still a bad habit.
On the other hand, I can't argue, some people cannot accept your opinion and it only makes them angry to have you talk about what you think/feel. But then if that's the case, why would you want a relationship with someone that cannot understand you?
On the other hand, I can't argue, some people cannot accept your opinion and it only makes them angry to have you talk about what you think/feel. But then if that's the case, why would you want a relationship with someone that cannot understand you?
2. Trust
I think this one is pretty obvious. You cannot play a doubting detective role and enjoy the relationship at the same time. Where there's doubt, there's anxiety, frustration and at times even a little bit of paranoia :). You cannot possibly enjoy your time with a person when you're always on the lookout for things that might give them away.
I know people may hurt you and I also know that it hurts like crap because I've been through it as well, but then again, it's not fair to discard the potential in the new people you meet just because of some past morons. After all, we are not all the same so why lose the chance of meeting a great person? Just because you were hurt in the past? Well look at you and the way you overcame it, becoming stronger in the process.
3. Selflessness
I know people may hurt you and I also know that it hurts like crap because I've been through it as well, but then again, it's not fair to discard the potential in the new people you meet just because of some past morons. After all, we are not all the same so why lose the chance of meeting a great person? Just because you were hurt in the past? Well look at you and the way you overcame it, becoming stronger in the process.
3. Selflessness
Selfishness can be a good thing, but in a relationship, both sides have to give that up at times if they want it to work. You share the good and the bad times together so it's only fair to share other things as well.
4. Empathy
You cannot be an ice cold person and expect to have healthy, happy relationships - unless your partner is into that sort of relationships as well. Even at times when your angry and you feel like your partner has wronged you, try to listen to his side of the story, and see if he/she is okay. Chances are, they're feeling worse than you do because they hurt you and they hate that. Besides having to deal with your anger and the nagging voice in their head that tells them how badly they screwed up, they also want to find a way to make things better, and guess what? It's hard to come up with good ideas under such pressure.
There's a Swedish saying that goes on like this: "Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I need it the most."
5. Truth
It's for the best. All lies do eventually come out so why complicate stuff?
It's for the best. All lies do eventually come out so why complicate stuff?
6. Desire to make it work
Instead of expecting it to miraculously work by itself.They say love is made and not found, and I agree. I'm not saying choose who you fall in love with 'cause that's impossible, I'm saying that after you found your soul mate don't expect absolutely everything to be shinny and great, and for the love of god, don't try to change them! Sometimes you have to make stuff work. You might have to compromise at times and put up with some of their annoying habits but remember they are doing the same for you.
Instead of expecting it to miraculously work by itself.They say love is made and not found, and I agree. I'm not saying choose who you fall in love with 'cause that's impossible, I'm saying that after you found your soul mate don't expect absolutely everything to be shinny and great, and for the love of god, don't try to change them! Sometimes you have to make stuff work. You might have to compromise at times and put up with some of their annoying habits but remember they are doing the same for you.
7. Understanding
Instead of immediately assuming stuff try to ask and listen. And remember to keep an open mind.
Instead of immediately assuming stuff try to ask and listen. And remember to keep an open mind.
8. Celebrating both the ups and downs
We all love to celebrate - that's for sure, but no one likes to go through rough times, and it takes a lot of strength, love and will power to stick together through those times. That's why you should at times celebrate the way you managed to overcome them! You earned it!
We all love to celebrate - that's for sure, but no one likes to go through rough times, and it takes a lot of strength, love and will power to stick together through those times. That's why you should at times celebrate the way you managed to overcome them! You earned it!
9. Spending time together
Whether you are watching a movie, playing a game, doing the dishes, cleaning the house or any other activity, make the most of the time you spend together, and live in that moment. Yes that means you should stop checking your phone or your emails when you're spending time with your partner. However, don't overdo it and remember to spend some alone time as well!
Whether you are watching a movie, playing a game, doing the dishes, cleaning the house or any other activity, make the most of the time you spend together, and live in that moment. Yes that means you should stop checking your phone or your emails when you're spending time with your partner. However, don't overdo it and remember to spend some alone time as well!
10. Ignore the he said she said
Really, some people spread false rumors as if their life depends on it. Chances are that what they're saying isn't true plus they are so good at seeing bad stuff even when it's not there !
Here's a picture I once found on the Internet and I think it's a great depiction of the way some people judge no matter what:
Wishing you the best,
Rachel
Really, some people spread false rumors as if their life depends on it. Chances are that what they're saying isn't true plus they are so good at seeing bad stuff even when it's not there !
Here's a picture I once found on the Internet and I think it's a great depiction of the way some people judge no matter what:
Wishing you the best,
Rachel
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